What in the shit is goin on?

Hello world! Viagra Viagra Viagra canadi4n dick pills yo. JK guys, jk, this is just a drill. It is used to make holes.

Alrighty then, so, what do I talk about here again? I feel like I’ve missed quite a lot of things. Like, GamerGate, whatever the hell that is? I think it might be about like not enough female protagonists or something and it is also tied into like feminist movements that aren’t really about equality maybe or something? No idea, don’t care at all though. Just figured I’d throw that out there since you’re kinda supposed to have opinions on things or something if you want to talk about games. So my opinion is, I don’t care, I care about games and how fun they are and how they mix shit up to make things more interesting, anything else is a waste of my time.

Butts and stuff! As you can see my vocabulary has progressed quite nicely since however long ago it was that I last posted frequently. I’m fuckin smart guys. So smart that I totally know what direction this post is going.

Gaemz. Apparently I was playing DayZ Mod last time I was posting, err, nope, I had stopped playing that and was playing Divinity and thinking about playing other shit like D3, CSGO, PoE, and AoW3. Those games are all fun. Divinity got tiring, we felt like we made it pretty far but it was pretty slow going and I guess we kinda just lost interest. PoE always sucks because their fucking servers blow and I always forget about that until I’m level 30 and the servers start to suck. I don’t even have to mention D3 because jesus christ, I just can’t make myself do that anymore really. CS is kind of in the same boat as D3, sure they’re good but, I’m just tired of it.

I feel like I’ve played a lot of games recently, some being out of my usual comfort zone. I hardly play any MMOs anymore which was one of the big genres that got me into writing about these things. It’s like they don’t even try anymore, or maybe they are trying and I just can’t do the fuckin quest hub to quest hub never reading the quest text cus it is a god damn race against no one for some reason.

I’ve played a fair bit of Arma 3 mods, namely Battle Royale, Breaking Point, Exile, and King of the Hill (not really a mod I think?). I always have a lot of fun playing these mods but it always ends up being a little frustrating because it is fucking Arma and Arma is fucking wonky sometimes. If you’re kind of into those games though I would recommend trying all of those mods.

Recently I downloaded Darkest Dungeon again as I hadn’t played it since the initial Early Access phase. Holy shit is that game fun for some time. I was pissed at first due to corpses and got to like week 47 in a game with corpses disabled. I had a team of 4 up to level 5 and lost half of them before retreating. It was a pretty sad time, but I got over it. I did so by starting over, this time playing with corpses. I really like the mechanic now that I get its purpose, which is to make some of the classes that don’t seem as useful pretty fuckin useful. I always play by keeping my torch at 75 or above because I’m scared, but recently I’ve been thinking about trying the crazy no torch shit. We shall see. I would highly recommend this game, normally I wouldn’t try something that looked so, not 3d and shit, but it was definitely enjoyable.

I recently got the Secrets of Grindea early access game and have been enjoying it. It isn’t complete but I’d suggest that you try the demo. It is just a classic little rpg with fun dialogue. Only played one night coop so far but it has definitely left its mark on me. I’m now searching for other games I can use my ps4 controller to play though I haven’t quite found anything yet.

I’ve played a decent amount of those early access survival games. I also tried Wurm Unlimited recently. Now I used to be a regular at pker.org which was all about pvp and UO and how good the old days were and such, it shut down a long time ago, but this Wurm game was talked about a lot back then as being the ultimate game we all wanted. Full loot open world pvp was that popular tagline iirc. Anyways, that is not what Wurm turned into apparently. I downloaded the server software so I could play with my friend and found the default settings are 3x skill gain and 3x action time, meaning that the game is supposed to be 3 times slower skill gain and take 3x longer to perform actions. I cannot imagine playing it that way as the grind is already so fuckin real. It seems the only people really playing this game are more into Minecraft type building stuff. From what I experienced on the Mythmoor server the game is pretty cool though it is very daunting, hard to figure out at times, and of course grindy as all hell. But if you’re into that, give it a whirl. You can play Wurm Online for free I believe to try it out. Wurm Online is like the official version whereas Wurm Unlimited is like the player created server version.

Right now I am thinking of playing Salt. It is another early access open world survival game. The main difference is that you can build boats, the world doesn’t end, and there are pirates! I really want to build a boat and fuck up some pirates, like so gdamn bad right now. The graphics look pretty shit and I just know it is going to have its problems due to early access open world survival, but, I don’t even care man, I just wanna fight some pirates on a boat I made.

Oh yeah, I tried Blade and Soul a little bit. Holy shit how fuckin dumb. I could almost swear the minimap is the exact same thing as the one in Tera. The reason I fuckin hate this piece of shit though isn’t because it is necessarily bad, though it probably is since it is an NCSoft MMO, its because it pretty much stole $5 from me. There I am, launch day, waiting in queue to get in. I notice in the queue window it says, underneath my non premium queue, that the premium queue has 0 players in line. My friend checked and it is like 399 points for premium for like 7 days or some totally dumb gay microtransaction bullshit, but we figure, fuck it. As soon as we purchased those packages, literally as soon as it happened, guess what the premium queue did? It changed from fucking 0 people in line to goddamn 3000 people in line. IT WAS THE SAME FUCKING AMOUNT AS NON PREMIUM QUEUE! That was pretty fucking infuriating, but the queue did actually start to move and after a few games of Rocket League we were both in and ready to be underwhelmed as shit. Suck a big fat dick NCSoft, you dirty fucks.

I think that about covers most of the shit I’ve done since my last post. I may try and get into doing this more, maybe play weird games I wouldn’t normally and review them, or just say dicks a lot, who knows. Anyways, ggwp.

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Bit of a Twist

WoW has been on hold a little bit, I am now trying to do a level a day with my priest, so far so good (currently 52).

Darkfall! What can I say… I rerolled. I know, I know, all that time AFK swimming/everything I ever did on him, gone. So the obvious question is why? Well, I will tell you! I was an Ork and I am now an Alfar. Do the hitboxes really matter and/or are they really different? No. I think I didn’t want to be that guy anymore, I just didn’t like him, dumb name, dumb face, looked big and felt tiny. It just wasn’t a good match. But now, I am tiny and I feel huge!

So what have I done on the new guy so far? Well I’m nearing 50 1 handed sword, 30ish Archery, 40ish Lesser Magic, 40ish Tailoring, and that is about it I think. My plan for this guy is to go full force into 1h/mounted combat, eventually rounding out with a 2hander and magic/archery skills as well.

I won my first fight in Darkfall already. I am currently 1-0 (on this guy) thanks to not getting ganked due to not running into to gankers, I got the shit scared out of me by some scary dudes who turned out to be friendly and familiar, but more on that later. So I’m killin goblins, right, and I’m not at the scouts only spawn so I need to stay on my toes due to shamans being buttholes (at the time) and kicking my ass. I’m fighting a Fighter and I see a figure with a shield in the distance, it looks very similar to a goblin so I don’t pay it much attention but keep it in mind. I kill the fighter soon after I skin it and as I am looting it I see this “other goblin” rushing me. Turns out this was no goblin but a red (alignment, so pk) Alfar coming to kick me while I have 50%hp. I switch to my sword/shield, unsheathe, and charge the guy hitting him before he hit me. We trade blows for a bit, one for one for the most part but I miss a couple so he got in 2 for my 1 a couple times. I am not winning and this is not cool. I start strafing like a mad man swinging my sword all over the place, doing this “swinging” like motion with my character and my sword swings (thats what it felt like – swinging) and before I know it I’ve hit him 7-8 times and he hasn’t hit me once. He ran behind some rubble (imagine a rock wall with the top broken off, one of us on each side) and I pulled out my bow. I drew my bow, this is when I heard his footsteps running away, I aim at the top of the rubble and see him jumping over the other side, I loose an arrow and hit him right in the back, reminded me of pulling some BS in cs. He keeps running and I keep shooting him, 2 more times in the back, he turns toward a hill and as he is about to go out of sight I loose one more arrow, knowing it will fall over the terrain and land in his ass, which is exactly what happened. I pulled out my sword, ran up, pressed x, and clicked for the gank. I looked at public chat and see that he let out a fuuck before he died.

So yeah, that was technically my first one on one victory against someone who wanted to fight me, and it felt real good.

I had completed the quests in my starter town and had one that sent me to the next place. This new place with a bank and two people feels pretty secluded and very unsafe. I get the quests to kill Hivekins, complete said quests, and then get the follow up quests to kill harder ones and the Queen. I venture out to the area marked on my map and discover the harder hivekin are fucking harder as shit, I also spot the queen aka that one dude in Blade that is fat as shit living in a basement. This is when I notice the other people with shinier armor. Shit! Hide! Did they see me? God I hope not. I begin moving to their side for a closer examination. I am pretty sure one of them sees me as he is facing in my direction and strafing left to right (I am hiding behind a thin pole so I am strafing slightly with him in an attempt to stay out of view). I come out from my hiding spot and put my xhair on him and shit a little bit more, this is Paragus, SynCaine’s guild leader. Shit now I’m going to die to him and maybe his friends and they’re gonna blog about it, damnit. There goes my e-rep…. But, that did not happen, he let me be. I begin killing a Queen when hell fire shit storms begin raining down on it from above. Then I got a pm from SynCaine himself asking me not to kill the Queen because Paragus is using it to skill up his big hellfire shitstorms. Pretty cool I thought.

I joined the clan NEW for some reason. I am pretty satisfied with this decision as I can get free shit if I like, which I haven’t, yet, and the NEW tag over my head makes people want to come and get some “easy pickins”, little do they know I’m not that new. So if I keep sticking to the newb areas while I skill up I hope to get attacked by more people like the one who I whooped.

That is it for now, time to play some games!

Darkfall Stats Update

Go go afk swimming! I am hearing conflicting reports that GMs kick for this and ban after multiple offenses, but I don’t get why that would be since numlock is the only thing I’m doing. I think most people who complain about it aren’t doing it in the open and are doing more borderline exploit shit to hide themselves and then afk swim. I get killed by people somewhat frequently so I’m not completely getting away with it, though my stats may say different. Shit, look at my xfire lol, big ol DF time.

It is fuckin early and I am off to school because gay buttsecks and all that. Then work. Then WEEKEND YAAAAAAAAY! I can’t wait to get tatered/r-tarded and make food with my baby and watch football, oh and play a shit ton of MMO.

Excitement! Adventure!

Hooray! I made friends in SWG on my roleplaying heavy (most people go there to roleplay) server. How did I meet these friends? Well, let me start at the beginning to bring you up to speed.

As you know I have started from scratch as a Smuggler. Well, let’s just say it isn’t easy repeating shit you’ve already repeated. It’s safe to say that my play time was diminishing. I attempted to correct this by making a new toon, an Entertainer! I’ve never played one, and it is so gay lol. I made a Sullustian fat ass female, you know, Lando’s co pilot in the 6th episode at the end there, yeah, a female one. Fat and gross as all hell, except I don’t wear clothes, so I’m in granny panties. Anyways, Entertainers hang out in Cantinas. Turns out, most entertainers are roleplayers, and most roleplayers hang out in cantinas. LOL. Man is it funny seeing them hold down shift to walk around each other. I won’t lie, it makes you want to do it too, but I found my way around this ghey hurdle.

You see the jump command in swg was definitely a fucking after thought. You have to hold it down to see the entire animation, which means, tapping it quickly, can result in awesomeness. What I like to do is, what I like to call “The Nutcracker”, which is me holding shift (walk) and tap jump a lot. It makes me look like a Nutcracker (imo).

This shit drives roleplayers fucking crazy. Which is hilarious to me lol, especially since they’re mostly teenfags with (ROLEPLAY) tags on (which is toggled, displays above your head), and to be honest they’re mostly all horrible at it(roleplaying). Half the time they’re just trying to play out some stupid fucking scene from a movie where one guy says: “I wouldn’t say that if I wuz you!” to which the other guy says: “Oh yeah well maybe I will!”.

It is fucking hilarious though. Especially the adult ones, who are like, really fucking serious about it. This one dude was ethuggin it up RP style and challenged the guy to a duel outside. He walks out of the cantina (I follow in full Nutcracker effect) and walks away around the corner, see, he’s roleplaying that he has to go get his armor, rofl. I mean, sure, good one in a roleplay sense, but, c’mon, fucking hilarious. Anyway, he comes back and whoops the teenfags ass.

One thing that’s also hilarious is OOC text. When they’re talking out of character (ooc) they put their text in parenthesis. I’ve received a few ((Fuck you!))s, a couple ((/addignore you budday!))s (they don’t say budday btw) and I’ve got to say it’s quite funny to me. They’re all serious roleplayer mode and then they gotta stop their 4 man sausage orgy to OOC me in the face!

One thing that I noticed that I found interesting involved Mr. Walk around the corner to get my armor man. As he walked away I followed him for a while, bouncin around, and he said ((FUCK OFF)), so, I did because i don’t wanna get in trouble csr style. Anyways, I figured this guy fucking hated me, which I can understand, I really can. Anyways when he came back to duel the other guy and won I cheered for him. Now, when I did this, I was reminded of schoolyard behavior so goddamned much, and heres why. See I praised this guy (with a few people watching as well), and then he lets loose a lol or a haha yeah! Then I say to the loser: “You just got RPed in the face nobzor!”

This made the roleplayer dude fucking so happy and excited, it was like he got accepted into the cool kids club or something. I hate to say that, considering I’ve been that guy, no doubt, at some point in my life. I’m not claiming to be leader of the cool kids club or anything of the sort. I’m just pointing out what may be a common characteristic of roleplayers. Which is, the want to be accepted by their “arch enemies”, the leet speak pwnzor dudes like muhself. I won’t lie, I’d like RPers to like me, and PvEers. Iunno, maybe everyone just wants to feel a part of something.

Anyways, I made friends! Haha, one dude named -Souless- comes in the cantina and he’s doin the Nutcracker! I ran up to him and we bounced all over the place, it fucking ruled. Now, he ran off and I kept doing my thang and eventually I wound up outside watching the Jedis duel, which is a popular spot to see people. I end up running into my buddy again and we bounce all over the place, through all the roleplayers, it really makes me feel so good doing it. We go to the bank and his buddy is there, who is like 84 Jedi, fuckin awesome. He also Nutcrackers and now I’ve got 2 friends. It’s awesome to finally have friends like me.

It’s odd though, the Souless guy is either somewhat retarded or a youngin like I used to be. I always seem to get along so much better with young kids. I think its just because the funniest shit to me is asshole/dickhead funny shit. I know kids love that shit, its definitely a CS kind of thing I believe. Iunno!

So guess what?

We got stomped.

Game 1
Game 2
Game 3
Game 4

Yep, that’s right, we lost 4-0.

But hey, even when you lose you can turn it into a good thing. I now know that the way I’ve been playing in pubs, thinking that I am good because I can sneak around newbs and blow up a building. Good people don’t fall for that one heh. I’ve got to start trying to dominate the pub servers with melee. So, that’s what I’m going to be doing until our next scrim.

Well, besides playing another 14 day trial of Star Wars Galaxies, woooo! I don’t gots no bad intanets no MO! So I’m going to have some fun owning it up with a Commando or a Jedi, can’t decide yet. Commando pwns with the AoE dmg but Jedi pwns because it’s a fuckin Jedi AND they kind of get to craft (making lightsabers), and I kind of like crafting sometimes.