Misc, Random, Meh

First of all, I’ve been getting a few visitors looking for strafe jump scripts so they can bunny hop in CS. Strafe script CS strafe jump bunnyhop bhop, etc. (Hopefully this page will now show up when they search for it)

If you arrived here looking for a bhop script for CS, you’re a fucking nub. If you bind jump to your mousewheel, you’re a nub. How fucking hard is it to jump? If you’re complaining about your thumb hurting or your spacebar, quit being bad. I used to be able to bunnyhop in old school cs when I used the ARROW KEYS. That means I didn’t even have a spacebar. Seriously, why do you want to take the easy way out? It will not make you better, if anything, you’ll be getting banned from servers and you’ll suck even more than you already do. Nubs. You make me sick.

Alright, now that that is over. Next item of business. Apparently I have been passed in high score for the Hack n Slash mini game in FreeRealms. Their system is still shitty and broken because my personal leaderboard still says I’m #1 but the actualy leaderboard for the game has a guy with a higher score. Also, the score they have on file for me is not my highest score (as seen in the video). Will I attempt to regain my title as king of the kid’s games? Maybe.

Neeext. I’ve been playing a lot of BF2 and it’s been quite a releif. I’m actually having fun again, I’m lolling all over the place and my fiance is looking at me funny again. It’s real good. I started with using the Special Forces and Sniper kits to just get back into the swing of things. Recently, I’ve been using the Anti-tank kit, specifically the rocket launcher. There is nothing more fun than blowing up vehicles with rockets, there just isn’t. It’s like hitting people from long distance with a rocket in Quake 3. Helicopters are like midair rockets in Quake 3. I defended a point a couple days ago from 2 helicopters. It was probably some of the best fun I’ve had in a while because there were shipping crates (the big ones on the boats in the movies with rotten potatoes and shit) littered across the place for me to bob and weave through. Plus once you hit a helicopter once the pilot starts shitting himself and sometimes will be scared to death and crash.

Still considering getting Conan. Also considering picking up some of the FPSes I’ve skipped over the years. That is it mothafuckas. Fuckin Friday, oh hells yes. Bai2us.

August Fourteenth, Two Thousand and Eight!

Today (I say today but it was really yesterday) I upheld my WoW vow yet again by only playing CS. I don’t know why I just didn’t really feel like getting on WoW. I felt like I didn’t have enough time I guess so I am saving it for the weekend and tomorrow after work (tomorrow = today lol).

I looked at my scoutzknivez demo and tried to fraps a good portion of it but for some fuckin reason I have a 3.9 gb fraps video that doesn’t work because the shit fuckin died or something in the middle of recording. Then I saw that I already had some frapses of the demo and thought, way to go you fuckin retard.

So I took a 700mb avi, windows media encoded it into a wmv that is around 30 mb, and then played CS instead of uploading it to YouTube because it took fuckin 30 minutes to encode it.

I question the point now, after giving it more thought. Regular servers don’t have the air acceleration set to what scoutzknivez uses, so even though actually playing on a scoutzknivez server can improve your air strafing and your ability to jump precisely, I don’t think it really helps that much. I looked on youtube for some and there are guides for it, however, most of these guides are on servers where they only play kz maps which is just a race to a certain point via crazy jumping off the side of cliffs and over lava and shit. I am pretty sure those servers use some altered settings because the dudes are jumping and speeding up waaay too many times. In regular servers it isn’t possible to jump that many times and have your distance between jumps remain that large.

So I don’t even know if I’m going to upload it. Maybe I can just record a demo of me playing on a regular server and fraps the parts where I use it to my advantage. Meh. Maybe I’ll just drop it and focus on WoW lol. Like a good little boy.

I have a plan for WoW though. I want to run WC a few times until I have 2 Stinging Viper maces. Just look at it and you’ll see why I want 2. You can even view it as a 3d model and put it on a tauren male and then just imagine another one in his other hand, I think it’d be pretty bad ass. Not to mention the DPS lol. I’ll be the crazy snake wielding cow.

There is also a bunch of blue mail armor in there I may try and get, just so I don’t have to for a while. I don’t want to run every instance 20 times just to get all the loot I could use from it. Plus, I already got the Savage Trodders boots my first run through. So I only need to get the Breastplate and the belt that is better than the other belt.

I think that would be pretty bad ass. Maybe I can find some generous high level who will run me through it a few times, if not I guess I’ll have to risk grouping again! Lol. Ugh, I know, but it is a hard phobia to overcome. Plus it just takes so long when you’re a group of level appropriate players.

Just got on real quick here at work (shhh!) to see if my guild had a website or was planning to, lol, guess not! One of the higher ranks in the guild was on and I asked him then said to tell the leader that we should look in to it and he told me the leader was on his main. So I /t the main and he fuckin ignores me even though I offer to help be it money or actually getting the shit up and THEN he goes afk. 😦

Feels good to be loved. I hope this guild works out y’know, I don’t want to be hopping around from one to another like some 12 year old (just like i used to do) but I guess I can’t help it if they’re all run by 12 year olds amirite?

Maybe I’ll have to start my own some day, who knows.

God damn it now all I wanna do is play WoW! Motherfucker!

August Thirteenth, Two Thousand and Eight!

Today I decided to stay true to my vow and take it slow with WoW, by playing only CS! I had a great time too, good ol’ CSGamer GunGame. I finally won which hasn’t happened in a long looong time and now my total wins (according to the current stats) is 3. I know I won at least 20 times back in the day, because I used to be fucking ridiculous. I am semi returning to that ridiculous state of skrillz which feels good.

There is this ninja motherfucker named Kenny who plays there and he is the knife master, but I am also a knife master so we have a little knife master rivalry going on which is fun. If we’re on the same team it is just fuckin ridiculous because we knife fuckin everyone. Especially if we go the same way, he’ll knife a guy, I’ll jump in his way and shield him from the bullets and steal the knife, then I stab the next guy and he does the same, it is just fuckin awesome. I really had fun yesterday.

When I used to play at CSGamer I knew all of the regulars (mainly the good ones, but mostly all regulars) and nowadays that list of regulars has changed. But yesterday I think they started to notice me which makes me feel good on the inside like a itty bitty baby.

I’ve got my groove back, just like Stella. I can run and jump and instead of slowing down like most people who jump I speed up or slow down at a much lower rate because I know how to play the damn game.

There was one part that kind of pissed me off though. Me and Kenny had our first one on one knife to the death and I dodged his first couple attacks but he still got me. I jumped too much and then couldn’t move away quick enough. Then he says jump scripts won’t cut it. That made me pretty fuckin mad. Look at my Steam ID, 149960 (I think), that is fucking low man. I’ve been playing since beta 7, I make fun of people who use jump scripts because all the script does is execute commands that you CAN do on your own.

I’m going to try and describe how to “strafe jump”. The most accurate description I can give of it is that you’re “stretching” for extra inches. A lot of people try to strafe jump while still holding down the forward key, and that is wrong. You cannot turn as sharply and stretch your distance as far when you hold forward, now don’t get me wrong, I can do it in scouts knives while still holding forward and sometimes in regular games I will still hold forward to get a longer more obtuse curve, when I’m trying to knife at a greater distance, but the majority of the time you don’t want to.

Okay, here is a brief run through of what to do to strafe jump (you can strafe jump just once and have it be beneficial, it is difficult to jump multiple times and each jump gets harder in a chain of jumps). Hold forward and get to max speed. Jump and immediately let go of forward. While still in the air (hopefully you haven’t reached your maximum jump height yet) hold the left strafe key while also curving your mouse in an upward arch to the left. When you do it right you can feel it. Once you land you better not fucking hit forward. The exact second you land you hit jump again. Just as before you have to do this next part quickly while still in the air. Hold right strafe and curve your mouse in an upward arch (like an upside down U, like this n) to the right.

If you strafe right you curve your mouse right, strafe left curve it left. It isn’t that hard. The best place to practice is probably a Scoutzknivez server because of the low gravity and you don’t slow down hardly at all. Also, while in the air longer due to the low gravity you can practice your air strafe (which is the hard part on normal gravity servers), air strafe being the strafe left curve left strafe right curve right portion of bunny hopping.

The best way to try it out in the field is to play on a normal gravity server. Now run out and kill a couple guys and leave one to run away from. Strafe jumping can help you run away (or at least get out of view) so much that you really should know how to do it. Use it to get around corners as you’re running away. I say running away but I usually just use it to get some cover and to let my enemy’s recoil worsen and his ammo deplete before I jump back out and wtf own his face.

I will (I shouldn’t say this) try and get a semi instructional video made for strafe jumping and put it on here.

Another thing is that you can feel it when you’re doing it. This may sound cheesey like out of some martial arts film but it will feel like you are water. Or at least a paddle in the water carving your way through. It should feel like that and once you know that and how it feels and how it reacts to you then you can start to do some crazy shit.

For instance: most people can only air strafe when alternating directions (left then right etc). I, however, do not need to do this because I am just so god damn amazing. I will try to show you this.

I believe I already have a decent size demo recorded (with the cs tools) of me playing scoutzknivez. I will try and remember to view it today after work and get a little video of it. But it will probably just look fuckin stupid because you really have to move your mouse around a lot. A lot of people tell me that watching me first person makes them sick because of all the moving. Sometimes even I don’t know where I am, but I can always bring it home at the end heh.

Anyways, that was yesterday. Today I may play some CS, I may WoW and try to raid WC again to get a blue 1 hander, but I don’t know yet.

My love goes out to everyone who is losing/has lost their jobs, that shit is fucked up.