All over the road… and sea

Tax season is taking its toll on me as well as a visiting mother and grandmother.  But mom has returned home and while tax season has only picked up I felt obligated to not leave the google bots who read my blog hanging for more delicious content.  So let’s get to it!

Xcom 2 was the shit.  It is also infuriating at times but that’s the game man, sometimes it sucks but for the most part as long as you don’t play so long you get retarded, you will conquer them damn alien sumbitches.  My first victory in the previous game was led by Col. Watanabe so this time I made a rookie named Watanabe Jr., and he survived all the way til the end.  It was a weird little fun thing I normally wouldn’t do because, let’s be honest, spending a lot of time during character customization is kind of gay.  If you’ve played the first one and enjoyed it you will definitely enjoy Xcom 2, especially since they fixed Overwatch so your guys don’t shoot at already dead dudes.

I recently bought Blood and Gold: Caribbean which is a pirate game where you gather a crew, train em up, buy a boat, fight other boats, take other boats, sell boats, roam the land fighting bandits, leveling up, looting, selling, creating business and even creating your own empire that rivals the English, French, Netherlands, Spain, or the pirate Brotherhood.  It is made in the same engine as Mount and Blade: Warband, so if you played that and enjoyed it, holy goddamn shit will you love this.  Because there is a whole nother layer with the ships which can actually make it harder.

You start out with a really high tier ship so you do not want to fuck up and lose it, you really do not want to do that, I can’t stress this enough (trust me I have deleted and restarted like 4 times now lol).  Ok so let’s say that oh shit you weren’t paying attention to your boats hull % and after taking down multiple Smuggler ships your boat sinks and you get captured.  First you are sold into slavery and will wind up at either a mine or a plantation.  You will get choices occasionally asking if you want to try and escape on your own, convince others to escape with you, talk to the administrator, or keep waiting (for some reason).  If you fail while escaping it is possible you suffer some sort of stat loss, for instance I died once while escaping and it said the guards hit me so hard my face will be permanently altered, lowering my charisma by 1.  Sons of bitches I just put a point into Charisma!

Ok so lets say you convince all the prisoners to escape with you, once some of them are willing to help another option to signal the prisoners becomes available.  Selecting this choice causes you and all the prisoners to rise up against the guards and storm out of the mine/plantation.  Some of these prisoners will elect to follow you if you are successful which is pretty good, free followers are always welcomed, especially after you’ve lost your ship and your previous crew.  The hard thing is getting a boat again.  If you didn’t make enough money prior to your failure AND put that money in the bank at a town hall, you’re shit out of luck.  You can get a quest off a message board in town to kill like 5 bands of robbers on land for like 2000 money, but the shittiest ship you can buy is like 7000.  It is definitely possible but holy shit it is not even worth it.

The highest rank I had gotten allowed me to buy a Small Corvette for 45000 which is like 3 or 4 ships below the one you start with, which itself is like 2 or 3 below the biggest/best one you can buy for military purposes.  It is not a very forgiving game but you can buy yourself some safety by having multiple ships in your fleet (which is easy as you can capture them from Smugglers and anyone really).  What I do is I switch my ammo to grapeshot which does more damage to the crew than the hull and sails.  So you kill the crew, navigate near them and hold F to board.  Once you board and defeat them, finish the battle and boom, new ship that is yours.  Having multiple ships can help you in that sometimes you pick fights that are dangerous.

Say you see a band of Smugglers in 2 Small Sloops or some other pitiful boats, on paper it seems like an easy win, but you didn’t notice that it was like 70 Smugglers on those 2 tiny ships, that is the dangerous part.  So you’re doing the boat fighting and cool, everything is gonna be okay right?  They’re 2 tiny shit ships, no problem.  So you accidentally let one of them get too close to you and they decide to board you, well shit, now it is like your 10 guys against their 20, you’re almost never winning that, the best one I’ve ever won was like 10v15 and I think it was because I had a gun by then and was just sniping them from my ship, maybe my soldiers were more trained, no idea.  But if you lose that, they get your ship, your big fuckin flagship of awesomeness now belongs to a bunch of filthy Smugglers.  If you do not have a second ship in your fleet, you lose, you’re a slave, life is going to suck for a long time.  But if you do have a second (or third or fourth) ship in your fleet you will return to the ship battle and can switch to grapeshot and reclaim your big awesome boat.

The game has definitely pushed my tolerance as far as it can go.  One moment led me to alt+f4 ragequit which is something I haven’t done in a game in quite some time.  But I can’t help but want so badly to succeed at this game.  I have to be more aware of everything when I play so that I don’t fuck up which causes me to limit myself so I don’t get complacent.  Yesterday I started over for possibly the last time (hopefully I will succeed, if not I may just fuckin uninstall and give up lol) and had such a good start I couldn’t believe it.  I managed to upgrade all of my cannons to the best available to me as well as 2 ship upgrades to allow my crew to slowly repair sails and hull.  On top of that I was successful enough in my endeavors to manage to bank 25k, all in 55 minutes of play time.  It seemed so easy, but once I had that thought I knew it was a good point to call it for the night.  Just don’t want to fuck up and lose again.  Maybe I wouldn’t restart this time and just pretend to be like Captain Jack Sparrow (hurrdurr) working my way up shitty ships just trying to get back to the Pearl.  I do not want that life, I want to be a super awesome fuckin boat drivin, cannon shootin, sword slashing, musket firing, fleet captaining son of a bitch.

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