New frontiers for griefing

Ever wish you could go play UO and find some clueless newb to trick into screwing himself over? Ahh, those were the good old days (when I was the newb too!). What can you do nowadays to grief people? Well, you could’ve played Darkfall when it released, but by now I don’t think there are too many clueless people left. You can play any FPS (or any game for that matter) that has voice chat and group with as many people as you can, just waiting for that little kid with his squeaky voice, then make fun of him for it (but that will only be funny for a couple of seconds until you realize that you’re a dickface). Yep, there are not many options out there for griefing. You could spend a long fuckin time in EVE establishing yourself and it would still pretty much all boil down to tricking someone into trusting you.

Well my friends, you no longer have to yell inappropriate phrases and/or odd noises at people on the sidewalk as you drive by, for now there is Omegle.

What is Omegle? Omegle is pretty much just a 1v1 chatroom creator dealy. You go to the website, click start conversation, and you’re instantly connected with a stranger. The stranger’s name appears as, you guessed it, Stranger! You can disconnect from the conversation at any time and reconnect to a new one. It really is a neat idea and you can have some long and enjoyable conversations with a complete stranger.

Personally I have only had 2 good conversations out of probably 15. One was with an Italian fellow who was mapping the genome for wheat (or something like that). Another was with a Canadian who hates people as much as I do and smokes weed (we got along great!).

However, there are a fuckton of weirdos. For instance, one guy asked me if I wanted to have sex. I told him only if he was a transgendered 8 year old. He said, well maybe I am, and I said well then maybe I’m a dude. Upon learning I was a male he disconnected. Normal as shit if you ask me.

Most people you’ll run into will remind you of AOL back in the day. ASL? M or F? Oh and since they’re strangers, they probably won’t like you, so remember that.

If you visit during the work day, be prepared for a lot of kids. Yesterday I had the pleasure of talking to probably 4 kids between 15-17, and when I say pleasure, I mean damn I am sorry to a lot of people that I talked to on the internet when I was younger.

The best conversation I had, oddly enough, I began by saying: “Hey baby you ever have your asshole licked by a fat man in an overcoat?” (Jay & Silent Bob fyizzle) It is an odd game, probably because it isn’t a game.

But, if you play it like a game, and seriously try to have a conversation for over 5 minutes with each random person you’re paired up with, you will lose. You simply cannot please everyone conversationally. Most people will say Hi, but then it’ll go quiet and you have to just start quizzing them basically. It gets old quick, but if you’re lucky enough to run into someone that you click with, you will see the awesomeness of the idea.

Most of the people I talked to were from Europe, one Brazil, a Canadian, and surprisingly only one American (from Texas). The one american pissed me off lol. He was 16 and from Texas. He plays Counter Strike and we were talking about it for a little while, then in the middle of the conversation he just disconnected, fuckin asshole! My guess is his teacher walked up on him, or he fucking hates me and I’m a horrible person! Lol.

Anyways, you can have fun with it by just talking a bunch of dumb shit and seeing how long they’ll stick around.

Free Realms
I have yet to play any Free Realms. Fiance fucking ruined everything by being a stupid fuckin drunk that enjoys stupid ass tv shows. I played a few seconds of the tutorial this morning, it looked nice, and it seems like it will be fun. I am not aware yet of any possible ways to grief people, but I’ll figure something out!

My name Wener Indamouf got denied, go figure! Now I am stuck with Richard Smallpiper, lol, get it, Dick SmallDick. Yeah, aren’t I so clever.

I’m hoping I can pull some Nigerian Prince bullshit on some little kids though. It would suck to get banned, for tricking little kids lol. Iunno, I might wear it like a badge of honor, but I might get upset. Who knows.

Anyways, that’s about it. Laterzorz

Speaking of immature (+music I like recently)

EDIT–Just a little FYI, that is the only brown skinned model used as a picture for a Job in the game Free Realms. I’m not SOE, I did not make that decision, I just noticed it. Bitches.

Get it? Cus he’s black.


(Am I going too far with this one? I’m just making an observation, in a negative light mebbe)

Now for music I like recently!

Click here to go to my most recently created Pandora station. You can listen to it, or just view the list of songs I’ve thumbs upped!

How did I contain this much gheyness in just one post?

Brief summary of points I’d like to hit on:
Anger in the Blogosphere!
Free Realms!
I’m immature!
I am a tourist!
Am I special or delusional?
WoW+UO, a WoW server with UO rules!

Alright, where do we start? I know, ANGER ANGER WILL ROBINSON, ANGER! I’m guilty of everything I’m about to talk about. Everyone is fucking angry at someone, in MMO land, that is (probably IRL too, but who cares about that, amirite?). People who play WoW hate everyone who doesn’t, people who play DF hate everyone else, people who play EVE think everyone else is crazy, and those crazy ATitD players don’t even know everyone else exists! Well that last one doesn’t matter, but you get the idea. Now don’t get me wrong, I love Syncaine, but man is he angry sometimes. I half suspect that it is a bit of RP, but still, damn. Just go around and look through comments. People get so mad at others because they misinterpret what was said, or sometimes, inject some of their own thoughts into someone else’s. Again, I am guilty of this. It’s just fucked up.

Free Realms! Man did this one slip under my radar or what? I actually remember some old people bloggers talking about taking the whole family there when it comes out etc, but aside from that I completely forgot about it. My fiance plays Pogo a bit and though I’ve tried to get her to play MMOs the only one she could stomach was WoW and she didn’t make it passed level 10. This morning I showed her some of the trailers for Free Realms and I’m pretty sure she was sold on the puppies. Hooray for cute puppies! I’m kind of excited to get home and fire this up (while subsequently firing something else up, teehee!). I’ve got a good feeling she’ll join me without resisting, but ya never know.

I’m immature as shit and I’m pretty sure that is why some people are completely turned off by some of the things I say. When I’m thinking of my words I always find myself trying to make myself laugh. If it makes me laugh, it almost has to make you laugh, but if it doesn’t you will still laugh at me because I’m laughing at myself. Yeah, that’s right. I like being immature, it is my favorite genre of comedy, it is the genre where I excel. I understand that if I acted more mature my chances of making friends and having conversations about things besides wieners and butts will go up, but I’m fucking 22 man. I’m still young and I want to be young for as long as I can. I used to want to be so old, I wanted to skip 20-30 years of my life and jump straight into being old. That is pretty dumb. I am going bald though (and I’m not fighting it like a pussy!), which kind of sucks. Anyways, being immature is still funny to me, so fuck you.

Someone commented on one of Syncaine’s posts about how Keen is a tourist. Well, I am a tourist too! I play so many MMOs, but I always get tired of them pretty quickly, and I move on to the next one. I’ve been doing this for a very fucking long time, very gdamn long. I haven’t played one game for longer than 2 months straight besides FPS games or maybe Diablo 2 back in the day. That is just who I am. I honestly can’t imagine what it is like to play the same game for 6 months. How do you come home everyday and think: “Alright! Let’s jump back into this same fuckin thing I’ve been doing the last 5 months! Something different will happen this time!” I have no idea. Therefor, I am a tourist, but I don’t ruin games with my tourism (lol@WoW Tourists).

Am I special or delusional? I’ve said before in another post that I’ve thought I was living in a Truman Show type world a few times. It is probably because of some emotional/mental problems coupled with my extreme pothead paranoia. But anyways, I’m wondering if this is another case of that. Everytime I comment at BrokenToys (Scott Jennings) my comment says it is awaiting moderation. I am pretty sure I’m the only one (if not one of a few) being moderated. If that is the case, then damn, do I feel special. I mean, you know he knows my internet alias if he singled me out like that. To be honest, it is pretty fucking cool. I comment on almost every post there (well used to) but now I don’t even consider commenting unless I’ve got something solid to add. Sometimes I’ll write up a big comment and not even post it because it I’ll reread it and think I’m a dumbass. Anyways, perdy cool.

This one I found via PKer.org. Someone posted it up there and now there are a few of them playing. UOWOW.com That’s right people, WoW plus UO rules (aka full loot…) Holy fucking shit. I never went to this website until just now, and reading the rules makes me fucking cream my pants.
Here are the rules:

Rules:
-Full world PVP
-Item drops on death or suicide (1-12 items from equipped and bagged)
-Protective guards in town and starting areas (but not invincible)
-100% inter-faction game-play supported
-Guilds can have horde or alliance
-Groups can have horde or alliance
-Raids can have horde or alliance
-You can talk to anyone from either faction
-No arenas (all PVP is world based)
-Mark/Recall spells (like Ultima)
-Reduced spawn rates of all Bosses, creatures, in the world and dungeons
-All instances are singletons i.e. anyone can go into an instance at anytime grouped or not because there is only 1 instance.
-Repopulated zones for higher level content control
-Repopulated resource nodes for crafters to control
-Guild and Player housing
-Guilds will be able to control major cities as well like stormwind and ironforge
-Decorate your house with over 1,000 items from our object database
-Protect your garrison with CANNONS and other siege weapons.
-Custom itemization and new world events and items.
-Money drops x 15
-Starting mount (under pets tab)
-Mob kill XP x 10
-Quest XP x 3
-Rested XP x 2
-Exploration XP x 2
-Green Item drop rates x 10
-Blue item drop rates x 6
-Purple item drop rates x 3

Man that is just amazing to me.

Anyways, that is it.

Oh yeah! PKer.org could use some new faces! So stop on by and read the previous posts, get a feel for the place, and act accordingly! We really need some new people there!

LotRO’s Welcome Back Weekend

So I heard about this on Massively and since I’ve been tiring in AO, so I figured, maybe I’ll give it a go. The only problem is, I never actually paid for LotRO. I did the free trial exactly two years ago, but I wonder if I’ll be able to download/log in. Who knows (probably can’t).

Anyways, as you can see, my free trial ended exactly two years ago. The welcome back week begins tomorrow. I’m going to remote to my home pc and start downloading (if I can), hopefully it will be done or close to it by the time I get home (never under estimate the power of DSL!).

If I can’t play, who knows, I might just buy it finally. Maybe not though, maybe I’ll buy Conan since I haven’t played that, even in a trial. I’ve been saving money like a good little boy, it’s time to splurge a little.

Here’s to splurging!

Story time

Henry is an elephant that can fly. He isn’t like Dumbo though, he doesn’t use his ears because that isn’t possible. He uses a jet pack! You may be wondering, Bonedead, what the hell is an elephant doing with a jet pack when I don’t even have a jet pack? Well ya see, this is a special elephant, because he can talk. Well why can the elephant talk? Because he evolved bitch! Shut the hell up and listen to mah storeh!

So one day Henry was cruisin along the tree top canopies in some exotic ass rainforest in the mofuggin jungle (forest jungle mofugga!) on his way to visit his best friend, Dr. Mr. Dolphinface. Why is he a Doctor Mister, Mr. Bonedead? Because he got a doctorate degree in something and now he has the power, now shut the fuck up! Anyway, Dr. Mr. Dolphinface wasn’t a doctor of medicine, he received an honorary doctorate for his work in constructing a jet pack that works and fits an elephant. Not only that but he taught a damn elephant how to talk and then explained how to use a jet pack!

As Henry is flying over the canopies he notices below him there are swarms of monkeys and apes following him. He figures maybe it is just a coincidence and returns his attention to the sky. Ya see Henry was very fond of the sky, though that wasn’t always the case. Back when he walked around everywhere he had too much to worry about and focus on that was on the ground. He didn’t have time to look up and during long treks he didn’t have the strength to look up. Most of Henry’s life prior to being a jet pack wielding talking elephant involved long arduous walks across barren deserts and dry jungle. But now, now he could get where he needed to be with hardly any effort. If he gets too hot he just flies higher!

Henry was due for a refueling and a general check up, though Dr. Mr. Dolphinface was not an elephant doctor. But since Henry could talk he was able to help him. While staring at the clouds Henry spotted a small airplane. Airplanes were nothing new to Henry, in fact, most were chartered to find him flying for tourists to see. This didn’t bother Henry, because he was free to do as he pleased, and he enjoyed the company and the new faces. However, today Henry did not have time to spend with the tourists, for check ups and refuelings are no joking matter to an elephant with a jet pack.

Of course, tourists pay a lot of money to charter a plane over a rainforest jungle thing to search for an elephant with a jet pack and they will not give up easily. Over the years Henry has learned the lay of the land quite well, especially with his ability to speak, he was able to acquire large maps of the area courtesy of Dr. Mr. Dolphinface. This meant he knew where the country borders were, since this story takes place in a jungle rainforest, it is a safe assumption that in this area of the world the countries don’t get along with each other very well. Which means all that Henry had to do was cross over into another country and fly a bit lower than usual, so that’s what he did.

As he began to lower his altitude he looked down and noticed there was still a large amount of primates following him in the trees, and he turned his focus on them now. From his lifetime in the wild Henry learned that there is usually a dominant male leader for most animal families and groups. Henry began scanning the front of the pack looking for this dominant male primate, who he would undoubtedly have to direct his attention to were a meeting to take place between himself and the primates. He began to go faster trying to catch up to the head of the pack when all of a sudden the primates disappeared and the trees stopped moving. In fact the whole forest rainjungle was almost completely silent except for a small humming noise that was slowly growing louder.

This made Henry feel extremely uneasy so he ducked his head down and barreled on towards the Docs house. He was flying in what could be described as a trench among the tree tops, there was something about having trees around you that would calm Henry down. Henry began to feel more relaxed, he was breathing easier and his legs weren’t as tense. He began looking at the canopies below him for small reservoirs of water and eventually came across one. He slurped it up in one try and gulped it down, it was very refreshing. He went a few trees down and found another, this one he sucked in and squirted onto his back, which was also very refreshing. He found one more, he drank half of it and dumped the other half on the top of his head. Henry was very refreshed, he was calm again, and he had lost the tourists.

He began on his way again, it was along trek but hardly as tough as they used to be, if he were to have tried this trek without the jet pack he would have surely perished. A breeze began to flow by him and through the trees around him, making a smooth rustling sound all around him. It was at this moment that Henry heard a very strong noise to his right, as he looked over he could see who he believed to be the dominant male primate. He was obviously aged a bit, but not frail, very much strong and very much in charge. His hair was gray which automatically made him stand out amongst the other primates who were primarily black, brown, and light brown in color. His face was the most horrid thing Henry had ever seen. It seemed white and crusty. As if he had died long ago and came back to life, it was very weathered.

The primate hugged the tree with his legs and motioned by swinging his arms in Henry’s direction while howling menacingly. The trees all around Henry began shaking and he slightly increased his altitude while looking below him to see what was coming. He was now emerging from his trench in the canopies and his pursuers were becoming more and more visible. Hundreds of monkeys and apes rushed up after Henry, some began leaping at him, and one small monkey managed to grab on to Henry and climb on his back. He increased his altitude to stay out of range of the others, who were now standing on top of the canopies barking and howling at him, it was now clear to Henry that he was being hunted. The monkey on his back began gnawing on his ears which made the ones below grow even louder and more enraged.

Henry swatted at the little monkey with his trunk, missing, again and again he swatted and grabbed for the monkey but kept missing. He then began going straight up with his jet pack, high into the sky, so high that when he looked down the massive mob of monkeys now seemed rather small. He flipped upside down and began to free fall. The monkey on his head was now biting harder but less often, he was losing his grip and dangling from Henry’s head. Henry grabbed again and this time he got the little bastard! He held the monkey tightly and began flipping himself back over as the mob of monkeys below again appeared massive.

Once right side up with monkey in grasp Henry hovered above the mob who was now extremely furious as he had their friend in his clutches. The leader emerged and the mob went silent almost immediately. Henry stared at his deformed face in disgust, this was without a doubt the ugliest primate he had ever seen. The primate leader motioned to Henry, what Henry assumed meant “Give him back”. Henry was not going to be bullied and needed to let these primates know that he was the king of the jungle rainforest as far as they were concerned. So he took the monkey and held it up to his jet packs propulsion systems, where half of it instantly disintegrated. He looked at the remains and felt sadness, this was not Henry’s way, he was better than this.

When he looked at the primate leader he noticed it’s mouth was wide open in shock. The primates had never seen such destruction before and were left in awe. Henry threw what was left of the corpse at the alpha male, hitting him square in the chest, and it fell to his feet. The primate examined the body, his face regained it’s composure, it’s intensity. The hairs began to stand up on it’s body as it looked at Henry. The leader flung the corpse off into the trees and roared at Henry so fiercely that it startled the mob of primates around him.

He began squawking rapidly and moving his arms and his followers began to react. They began bunching up together and climbing on top of each other. Henry knew he had to start moving and fast as he saw the leader began charging up the mountain of monkeys, heading straight for Henry. The terror that was his face slowed Henry’s reaction time, it was as if he forgot how to fly. He was frozen, completely frightened, and then came a loud roaring. The noise became louder and louder, it immobilized Henry even more and caused some of the monkeys to flee from the pile, which slowed the primate leader.

As the leader reached the top of the primates he leaped with all of his might, arms outstretched towards Henry, mouth wide open ready to rip and tear. He was so close now that Henry had given up, he would be swarmed by these primates and killed. It was at this moment that the roaring revealed itself. An airplane flew directly overhead, it had a hook dangling from it which appeared to be magnetic as it honed in on Henry’s jet pack and hooked onto it flawlessly. As the primate was about to strike, Henry was tugged away by the plane, and the primate fell into the canopies below. As Henry watched he saw the leader began tearing apart those who fled the pile and flinging their intestines all over the place. He stared up at Henry and let out one last roar. Henry was saved.

(What the fuck am I doing?)