I love Warhammer

I really do and I’ll tell you why my friend.

It is CS, in RPG land, a perfect match made in my fucking image of heaven. I love every goddamn second of it because I am so goddamn good.

Waaahhh, Bright Wizards are soooo OP omg, I’m gonna cry!!!!

Stupid fucking baby destruction, reroll Order you fag. Bright Wizards are the squishiest motherfuckers in all the land, and I rape them for fun.

Seriously, this is what I do when approaching the mass of Order.

I stealth before I’m in range and since I am usually the first person they see, half of them lose their targets right before the 2 armies collide, so that is plus fucking 1 for me.

Then I pick my first target, a caster in the back or off to the side. I have 2 use from stealth skills, one does damage to the target whenever they use a melee ability, the other does damage to the target whenever they MOVE. Haha, I bet you can guess which one I prefer.

So I pick out usually a squishy ass bish who looks like he would try to run away in fear for his life, because doing damage every time they move really fucking adds up. Shit, pretty much all of the order on my server probably don’t even know I can do that. Sometimes I’ll put it on a guy and then switch targets and after I kill that guy I’ll see the first guy running away taking damage out the ass lol, they have no idea.

Sometimes I will put it on the first tank, because he is bound to do a lot of running around. Pretty much if you’re not an Ironbreaker or a Swordmaster and I jump you from stealth, you’re fucking done, just give up dude, I will die for the 1 kill and 1 deathblow you will give me. I will take scolding from my teammates to stick with the group just to make you lose, and I will never regret it. You should pretty much be shitting yourself right now.

Do not run away from me. I’m just telling you, that is a good way to die. In case you didn’t know, a Witch Elf’s throw slows you if it hits you in the back. Also, a Witch Elf’s throw can proc my bonus damage as well, it also uses less action than a regular melee attack. My proc chance is 50% buddy, my proc damage is around 120-140, after mitigation. You know you don’t have a lot of HP man, why would you run away?

I know I am not untouchable. I know that sometimes when I chase someone into the crowd that is their team that I am probably going to die, which means I also know that I HAVE to kill you or else I have failed. You should be scared. Not to mention the whole morale boost thing.

What is that, you say? Morale boost thing? Yes, this is not a game mechanic I speak off, but rather a human mechanic. Interesting Mr. Bonedead, but how does it work? Well my friend, I will tell you!

When I jump the Runepriest alone, in the middle of your whole team, my team sees this. They are rooting for me to fucking kill your only hope of survival, your healer. If I can do this, by sacrificing myself, my team will want to fucking destroy every one of you order fucks. Not to mention all of you guys switching targets to me, see because now instead of focusing on our healers you are focusing on yours. You’re not taking out my teams squishies, you’re taking out my teams assassin, you’re taking out my teams leader, which is exactly what I want. Infuriate my team, please, I beg of you.

Many people forget about IRL morale, it is a very powerful weapon, and it is easily controlled through psychology/sociology, especially in an US vs. THEM mentality.

Of course it doesn’t always work, especially when I fail. But you know, how big of a problem is that really? I mean we sometimes have scenarios with 1 or 0 healers on our side, that seems like a much bigger problem to me than one Witch Elf suiciding on their healer. At least I’m trying to help, you know.

HERE IS THE PROBLEM WITH DESTRUCTION:
Pussy losers on our team. Yep, all of you motherfuckers who startin whining in /sc within 5 minutes of the start of the scenario. You motherfuckers are the reason we lose. I can explain this as being the opposite of myself. I attempt to inspire my team and raise morale whereas you feel like a failure, like our doom is inevitable, and you spread your fucking pussy breath around all over everyone and it makes them more like you. They stop caring, they just want it to be over so they can have their shit ass xp/renown and queue right back up with the hopes of more players like me being on their team.

The winners are the rushers, who do not show fear, who assert their superiority on their enemies with their “body language”. If me and my 2-3 other rushing teammates wipe the floor with Orders 2-3 rushing characters, the rest of the order team is watching this from a distance, and it fucking scares them. They think, oh fuck we just lost 3 fucking guys, now it is 9 versus 12, we’re fucking screwed OMG RUN AWAY!!!!

Whereas my teammates see it and think, holy shit we’ve already got the advantage on these motherfuckers! Heal those guys in front! We’ve got them on the fucking run, boys! CHAAAAARRRRRRGGGGEEE!!!!!!

That is how you fucking win, my friends. You don’t complain, you don’t cry, you don’t accept defeat. You fight til the last second, you bathe in the blood of your victims, and you push forward to victory.

Pansies can keep their fuckin mouths shut, because I am not here to lose, if you are then I suggest switching to Order.

DESTRUCTION FO LYFE!

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