Noble Jedis, not in the faces

I left off on my way to Bestine to become an Imperial Pilot. Upon arriving I talked to the commander dude and navigated my way through the dialog in a way that made me feel like a bad Jedi (aka my goal). I did a few missions, received a lot of Pilot Combat experience and little actual Combat experience (so I didn’t level). I was a bit bummed out, I had been told of a Legacy quest that would net me tons of levels once completed, and I didn’t know where it was.

I returned to Mos Eisley and began talking to every NPC with a quest icon above their head. I was beginning to lose morale at an alarming rate. That is, until I ran into an NPC that I had previously done a quest for. All I had to friggin do to continue on my original course was to talk to said NPC again and click “No problem dude, I love doing shit for you!”. I felt a rush of energy go through me and began my Legacy quest to the higher levels.

At level 10 I had received an area melee attack, I had previously destroyed my newb Jedi weapon and sold a better knife that I had found. If I had known that people don’t really sell melee weapons or craft weapons in general, I believe I would not have sold it. So I began fisting it up, which is always pretty exciting.

I do about 5 quests, gain a couple levels, and then receive another quest from Jabba’s main henchman, Bib Fortuna (right?). Basically I have to go sabotage some shit, kill some people, and steal information in the process. Long story short, I do all of that, complete the quest and am leveled to 14. Yay, new skills! What’s this? Choose a weapon for completing the quest?! DOUBLE YAY!

I pick the huge fucking pole arm lance thing and examine my new skills. I received a Heal spell (fuuccck yeaah) and an upgraded +strength focus spell. I was given some advice from a guild member to put my first expertise points into improved Heal, that it would help with the grind. So, I am really glad that I have this new Heal spell. I decide to test it out (before adding more points to improved heal) and it heals me for 500, which I assume is a bit less than half of my HP, friggin awesome.

Along with the two new skills I received a “Force Crystal” (oooooh ahhhh) which it tells me begins a quest once inspected. MORE EXCITEMENT INTO MAH BODEH. I can’t wait to make bad Jedi choices and am frowned upon by the good ones. IT IS MAH DESTINY.

After I settle down, I realize it’s getting late and I head back to Mos Eisley. As soon as I get home from work today I’m 1) Going to eat tons of Applebees Mini Burgers (girlfriend brings them home) then 2) Going to begin my Jedi quest and finish it, and finally 3) am going to resume my Legacy quest which has me hunting people down in Anchorhead (OH NOES TEH REBELS GONNA SHOOT ME) and Bestine.

Comcast still sucks my balls and playing this game with shit ass internet freezing every thirty seconds to a minute really makes me want to switch to Verizon DSL.

Another new day, another new shine

So in my last post I considered becoming a Structural Trader in the world of Star Wars Galaxies. Thanks to only using a 14 day trial account, I found that I cannot place Mineral Extractors (trial account) and am no longer attempting this route. It was a pipe dream anyways, I just wanted to be like Foton a.k.a the Grumpy Architect.

So I rolled a new toon on a different server. My initial plan was to be a Smuggler but then I decided, fuck it, I’m going to be a goddamned Jedi. If I am to experience the NGEs to their full extent, I may as well play a Jedi. So now I’m a Jedi.

I start out in the newb Space Station with Han, he sends me off on my first quest to meet the jedi dude. This dude gives me a quest, but, I don’t read the dialog and just follow the waypoints. I arrive at an “Angry Guard”, I talk to said guard and have a few choices to advance the dialog with. I choose the screw it, fuck those guys route, and finish the quest. Shortly thereafter I get a message from the Jedi dude telling me that he’s upset, wahhh. Apparently Jedi’s try to keep the peace (ohhh yeah) and I definitely didn’t do that.

As soon as he’s done talking to me, another transmission is received from a “dark Jedi” type dude. He is proud of me and tells me to go upstairs and kill some friggin beatle bugs, and then to slaughter their queen. After killing the queen he congratulates me and talks about letting the anger fill me up and such. Then he sends me on a new quest, to talk to the Stormtrooper on the Station and tell him to blow the shit up when I leave (giving his life for the Empire!), hoorah!

I anxiously try to leave without doing nearly as many quests as I did on my Trader, which Han tells me is not a good idea. God damnit, I am an all powerful Jedi you motherfucker, and I’m fucking angry. I guess the game did a good job on immersion for this route. So I dick around with a few quests, reach level 5 and finally, Han says we can go, after I do some shit for him of course.

So I do the shit, leave the station, and Han gives me a quest on Tatooine to find parts and build a Landspeeder. Neat, a free car, this did not happen on my Trader. I do the car quest and then receive a transmission from some guy telling me that Jabba wants me to do some work for him because I know Solo. I try to tell him I don’t even like the guy, but of course, to no avail. So I’m doing Jabba’s dirty work, getting the Mayor of Mos Eisley to pay him some money, and gaining a few levels in the process.

Then, no more quests are dropped onto me, I have to find them on my own. So, I decide screw that, I’m going to repeatedly kill the Tuskens and become more Jedi like. As I am doing this a nice imperial fellow approaches me and takes me around town a bit. He asks me to join his guild and I accept. After all, what’s the point of being a bad Jedi if I’m not on the bad guy team?

I join the Imperials, join the guild, and he gives me some money and a Swoop bike. Which is much faster than my Landspeeder. He also points me to the Jedi Legacy Quest giver, and tells me that the Legacy quest should get me 50 or so levels, yay. I start the quest, it shows me the bank, bazaar, and the cloning facility. Whoop dee friggin do. The only quest he now offers me is to go be an Imperial Pilot in Bestine, which I’m probably going to do.

I don’t get my Lightsaber until level 28, I am currently level 10 (after one night have you) and my friend informed me that I will probably reach level 50 or so in a week. So, there is hope yet of seeing that Lightsaber!

I must go now, may the force be with you!

A new day shines, and I shall craft

I recently downloaded the 14 day trial for SWG. For the r-tards in the crowd, that’s Star Wars Galaxies. Now some of you might consider me an r-tard now that I’ve admitted to playing SWG after the NGE and such, but I have goals beyond your comprehension! Seriously..

Anyways, I’m going to play a Structural Trader. That means that I’ll be able to build houses, furniture (oh joy!), and spaceships (fuuck yeaaah).

Now before starting I read up a little bit on what the new and improved SWG is actually like. As some of you may know, most of the rantings found on the internet on this case are usually along the lines of: “OMFG WTFBBQ DIS IS SO GHEY”. (I know, who says BBQ anymore)

But I really couldn’t find an unbiased source. Everyone was just mad about the shit, except for one guy, but he’s not important.

I made myself a female human (first attempt at faking female in an online game) and began on my journey to controlling the world of SWG (via massive amounts of money I want to make).

There is a tutorial which is much better than when the game originally launched (without one) and it involves Han Solo, C3PO, R2D2, and Chewy. Neat. Do some quests, yadda yadda yadda, get some experience, yadda yadda yadda, not really understand what the fuck is going on.

Apparently with the NGE, I can’t craft and still have a weapon specialization (eg Pistoleer). However, as I increase my craft level, I believe my combat level also raises. Allowing me to use higher level weapons.

One neat thing about this new SWG is the FPS/twitch-like combat. How cool is that. I click as fast as I can (or hold the trigger) while aiming and it’s really quite fun. I guess a lot of people didn’t like this aspect, because, well they suck at FPS games. Quite a few of the mobs you’ll fight will run around you or behind you making it a tad more difficult to hit, which is pretty neat.

While in the newb Space Station (remember Jump to Lightspeed expansion) with Han Solo, I received a couple Pilot quests. I must admit I got a little excited. Firstly because I have played Earth and Beyond (so ghey), Freelancer (freeeeeee), and EvE, in that order. I’m an FPS man at heart, and I could only imagine how fun it would be.

My mission: meet up with a guy and give him some fairy dust or some shit. What I did: start shooting fucking everything. Blues became red and I became excited. After I had killed just about every ship in the area (it was so enjoyable) I remembered about my mission, and find what I believe to be the fairy dust receivers ship wreckage, whoops.

Those who play games with me know that I have a gun-ho, rambo side to me. So this incident would be considered somewhat normal. I return to my Space Station (that’s no moon, just kidding) and am alerted with a YOU FAILED FUCKHEAD message, which I treated as a badge of honor. So I get the quest again, fly out there, find Mr. Fairy dust himself and dock with his ship. Transfer said fairy dust and hooray, I am done.

I had a few quests left in the Space Station, but I decided to leave with Han and go down to Tatooine. As soon as the world loaded I quit the game and went to friggin bed.

Comcast comes today, maybe they’ll finally fix my shit, though I doubt it. In the meantime, I’ll be lagging it up with some sweet arse crafting, SWG style! Because we all know SWG had the most enjoyable crafting system (resources at least).

My Chronicles of Comcast

So, the gamer finally moves out on his own into the world. He can’t afford cable internet for a few months, but he abides. Anxiously waiting for the day he can yet again hear the cries of newbs around the world as he crushes their nubness with all his glory. Some day, Comcast, you shall be at my house.

The glorious day arrives (late July) and boy am I ever excited. So what’s the first thing I do? Well instead of renewing a subscription to an MMO or two I decide I want to pwn some newbs in CS (1.6, no source here nubs). So I join one of my favorite servers (CSGamer Gungame) and commence the raping. Two kills later as I’m about to jump around a corner and stab some face for that free level and degrading kill I freeze midair, glance at my net_graph 3, and notice that my ping has jumped to 300ms. Joy! I figure it’s just a hiccup, you know, the newly connected cable letting me know who’s boss. So it unfreezes and I’m dead, I haven’t respawned because I guess when you lag during that time you just don’t.

So I figure, maybe it’s just this server, it’s been known to have problems in the past and I can’t have a fault Comcast internet connection right, there’s no way that could be possible. So I hop on Guild Wars because you don’t have to pay to play and I’m jonesing for some gaming. After 30 minutes of play, 10 minutes of being slingshotted across the zones I was in, and 20 minutes of being told I’m trying to attack too often, I check my ping. Ping: 257 Average Ping: 2000. Joy!

So I call the apartments Comcast hookup, on the inside! I originally felt so privileged to have the name and number of a Comcast worker provided to me by my complex, at first. I call him, explain that the entire weekend, ever since I’ve had the cable, that it hasn’t been working properly. I try to explain about how the only reason I got it was to play games online, that ping matters in these games, and was met with confusion and not very much care. He told me he would be sending a guy out the next day between 5-8, I could be home at this time.

Next day, 4:30 PM, I recieve a phone call from Comcast. It’s the guy who is supposed to be coming over, I mean helping me via phone, because it’s obviously some problem on my end that can easily be fixed, over my cell phone. This guy keeps telling me everything he sees is just fine, he can see no problem. I run a tracert to, line 1 is under 1ms each hop (to my router), line 2 times the fuck out every damn hop for every tracert I do (which I’m told is probably my connection to the apartment complexes “central cable hub”). So the guy tells me he just ran a trace route and everything looks okay, god damn I hate lazy people who don’t want to do their jobs.

So he tells me he has to connect me to a more technically qualified err, technician. I’m on hold for 5 minutes, and bam, I’ve been hung up on. I’m about to call my best friend whose name and number I have (My Comcast insider man, thanks apartment complex!) and as I am dialing I get a call, it’s Tech Douche #1, he apologizes for the disconnect and continues the transfer to the more technical tech guy. Finally, a voice who isn’t a commercial. This guy asks what my problem is, I explain the whole game thing again for the third time, am again met with confusion and lack of care. I mean I’m just a kid who plays computer games right, what do I know, what do I matter.

He goes on to tell me he sees no problems (gee you fucking think?) and then asks me again what the problem is exactly that I am experiencing. I again, explain in full detail, about gaming online. What is his, more technical tech, response? With the 6mbps down package you’re not supposed to be able to play online games. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? I have had this same package in multiple households for around 6 years, I have never encountered this problem ever. Yet, as soon as I get it connected at my own place, my first fucking place, the day it is connected, I have these problems.

I mention something about having no problem cancelling my cable and losing a few mbps to switch to DSL. Oh, now I’ve got your attention, I see. He says he can schedule for a tech to come to my house (I’ve heard that before) the next day, I agree to the times, but have to take off some work in order to be there in the only times they are available. Then he mentions the whole, service charge, thing. I blow up, letting him know that I’m not paying a damn thing for this shit because the only thing I’ve tried to do is play fucking computer games. He explains they’ll only charge if it’s a problem that I created, fine, whatever.

The tech comes over, I show him my tracerts, how they all time out on the second line. Yet he still has to fiddle with my computer and shit, for some fucking reason. I decide to sit in my living room and wait for the guy to tell me he can’t do shit. After a few minutes I hear his fat man sighs, and finally he emerges from my room with his bullshit explanation of how he fixed it, though he would still send some maintenance guys out to check outside. Apparently unplugging my router, and “changing some stuff on your modem”, was the only problem I had! So he leaves, I get on my computer, fire up the ol CS, and am met with the same fucking problem I had in the first place. Joy!

So I call my best buddy in the whole world, David, my Comcast inside man (thanks apartment complex!). I have the tone of someone who is about to take their business elsewhere, and he’s quick to reassure me that the maintenance guys will fix the problem. A few days go by, I notice 2 Comcast vans parked in front of my building one day, hooray I think! Comcast is here to help me! Wrong! Nothing has changed, my shit still sucks, and I’m about tired of watching fucking movies all the goddamned time.

I get a call from an inside man at Comcast, John, who gives me his extension 7612, just not the number it’s an extension of. He offers to upgrade me to 16mbps down while I wait for my connection to get fixed. You see, John here has talked to plenty of gamers around the office, and apparently servers like to fuck up my internet, DUH! So after listening to his bullshit attempt to convince me he even talked to someone who knows what online gaming is, our conversation ended. I was somewhat hoping my internet wouldn’t get fixed so I could have 16mbps down for the same price as 6, yet I also kinda figured it wouldn’t help at all.

So, I bitch to David a bit more, and he tells me on this request for a tech to come out he will make it so that a more knowledgeable tech will come (probably stamped it: URGENT) and save my fucking day. So, two guys show up at my door (this is the 2nd day I’ve had to take off work for this shit) and I let em loose on my shit. Apparently they need to know who came here last time, which didn’t really sound comforting to me. They then commence digging in my wall, fucking with wires. Hooray!

Thirty minutes later, they’re done, they apparently fixed some problem in there, it should all be okay. Wrong again! Nothing has changed, oh yeah, my internet has gotten slower and now my TV sucks too. Man, how fucking awesome is this going to get? So today I call my buddy David, no answer (in the middle of the working day), so I leave him a message regarding how much my shit sucks, still. Instead of him calling me back, the last tech to show up calls me. I tell him it’s gotten worse, and now my TV even fucks up.

He tells me when he was outside digging in the dirt, he noticed some problem, and was sending maintenance out to fix it. Fine, I’ll see if this fucking does anything, though I really doubt it will. I can play some more singleplayer D2 until I am forced to get DSL and never pay Comcast.

So i get home, check the mail, and bam! Another Comcast bill, alfuckingready? This time there is a service charge for $38. Apparently, the first tech found a problem on my side (even though he fucking sent out maintenance guys) and figured it was cool to just charge me for his time. Neat. So now I have a $100 Comcast bill that I’m not even going to think about paying until this shit gets straightened out.

As a fresh on my feet youngin, just moving out into the world, I am somewhat shocked that people actually suck this much ass. I mean you hear about it all the time, it just doesn’t happen to you so, obviously, it doesn’t exist.

I read tons of the Comcast sucks horror stories on the net, while using Comcast. I just never really knew how much they actually fucking suck.

If there’s anyone out there who can help me, I’d really appreciate it.